Tears Hollow
by Seratone
Summary: Myself; Yourself Based during episode 11. Asami’s POV. Yuri.


We were alone, Syuri's grey eyes staring, her grey hair washed out upon ever-white walls, while corrosive chemical odours drifted their way through the long, bustling, hospital halls and colourless sheets clung desperately to my void, listless body. It had been but a few hours since I had tried so desperately to protect her, throwing myself, without thought, into the grasp of danger. Yet the pain from that moment paled compared to the pain that I had clenched inside of me. Silence had laid its heavy hand down between Syuri and I. Her eyes following mine as panic triggered inside my mind, just a few moment ago I had been committed to this path, without a single doubt left lingering. It had been so easy to empty all my guilt out to Sana; however, as the others had reluctantly walked out, and I watched her flawless body standing alone across from me, her ever present, positive smile absent from her face, I could feel the doubt riot its way back into my conciseness.  
Here in this emotionless room, I would open my heart once more to the girl I loved, the girl who my whole body ache for. Yet who drove my mind in upon itself, twisting and buckling, shattering my innocence. Alone as we were, I could not help but let my mind slip back, recalling the memories of the first time I had opened myself to her. We had been alone then also, but back then it seemed as though I could have been surrounded by a hundred people and it would have still been just Syuri, always Syuri. I had often wondered, afterwards, that perhaps it was that single minded affection that had blinded me to my eventual downfall, a downfall that now was so insultingly obvious. For all the times I felt we were alone, she never felt the same. Even that day, the day I could not hold myself together, the day I confessed what I felt for her, He was there. He was in her heart as she smiled so sweetly, trying so hard not to break mine. He was in her thoughts everyday henceforth, as she went about like nothing had changed between us. He was part of her, and would always be with her, in a way that I could never be. Twins in birth and twins in life. Jealousy had ripped through me in wake of that truth. Filling every part of my broken, shattered heart, only stitches of anger and hate held me together. I was driven by those emotions, to do such terrible things. Spreading my own fears to others and giving birth to rumours that spread like wild fire, destroying everything that stood before them. And yet, despite my pain, I had still protected her, without the slightest hesitation.  
A shuffling of feet brought me harshly out of my own head. Looking up, I found myself staring into Syuri│fs tearful eyes. I couldn│ft help but be memorized as tears continued to cascade down her faultless skin. I had been so lost in my memories that I had failed to notice as Syuri working her way across the room to my bed.  
│g...thankyou│h, She whispered, as she carefully leant towards me, placing one knee upon my bed. The bed creaked in protest, I flinched, Syuri stopped and for a time nothing, but the overwhelming pounding of my heart, moved. I could no longer hear anything over its deafening beats, I couldn│ft see anything but those shinning eyes, and I couldn│ft feel anything except desire. A desire I could not resist. My mind began faulted, flickering out of awareness.  
I reached, grabbing her arm, dragging her to me. Time slowed as the distance between us closed, as if it was trying to resist, yet I watched her gently close her eyes and I did not seem to matter. I took her soft cheek in my hand and kissed the girl I loved. The world around us ceased to exist; there was nothing but her soft form in my arms and her supple lips against my own. She did not resist as I opened my mouth, letting my tongue caress hers, instead she wrapped her warm arms around me. My yearning began to burn more intensely the more I felt her touch. I lowered her against the welcoming bed, lifting myself over her as I let my hands flow over the contours of her body, seeking skin beneath cotton attire. She moaned ever so quietly as I trailed kisses down her neck and a fire blazed in my very centre. I felt her hands as they crept beneath layers of my own clothes, adding fuel to the fire as they brushed across small of my back. Syuri, my mind was empty except that one thought, all my faults faded as if within that burning ember my innocence was being reborn. I was once again who I used to be, untarnished, full of love, dreams and life. Yet, as I placed another kiss on her collar bone, something in the furthest corner of my mind screamed out.  
A foreign smell drift past my nose, it smelt of musk, somehow familiar but none-the-less wrong. In the depth of my mind a scream echoed again and in one crashing moment understanding cursed my conciseness. It smelt masculine, it smelt of him. Rain doused my burning as the room around forced its way back to reality, the light stabbing my eyes as I opened them. Syuri lay beneath me, breathing fast while tears still flowed from her closed eyes.  
│g...I hate you│h. The words fell from my mouth. I could barely breathe. Every pore in my body hurt, as if rejecting this reality. Here I was broken, twisted and empty, there was no love here, and so I let myself surrender to the demon inside. Syuri│fs wide eyes snapped open, looking at me in shock, a weak hand reached for me and was shoved forcefully away by my own hands.  
│gDon│ft touch me!│h my mouth screamed, │gI hate you, do you understand me? I│fm sick of you│h a cruel smile spread across my face │gdid you know I sent that letter? That I wrote those things in the class room? About you and your brother!│h It was as if I was watching from a distance, as my body screamed my secrets at her. I watched as she soundlessly mouthed the question why? │gWhy?!│h Why? Because I am broken. Because I am a terrible person. Because I am nothing but worthless junk.  
│gBecause you disgust me!│h The demon of rage I had become screamed.  
Not for the first time, silence reverberated throughout the room. I panted with the fury coursing it way through my blood. Syuri dropped her eyes from mine and stood before facing me. Minutes dragged themselves by before at last she spoke, in nothing but an undertone.  
│g...I│fm Sorry...│h She lent forward and brushed her soothing lips against my clammy cheek, turned and ran. I stared out the door until I could no longer hear the muted sounds of her footsteps against the tiles. My anger trickled away into nothing. I felt completely hollow and I knew she was not only running from my room, but from my heart and from my world. Empty tears began to fall from my eyes, making no sound as they broke on the cold, hard floor.


End file.
